Christmas Is No Time To Be Alone
by Ethereal Forest
Summary: Who can Ui count on when Yui isn't able to come home for Christmas? A fluffy Azusa x Ui oneshot from Azusa's POV.


**Christmas Is No Time To Be Alone**

Two women lay side by side under a fluffy duvet encased with a pale blue, snowflake decorated duvet cover with hands entwined. They were watching a flurry of snow pour down outside the rectangular window, opposite the bed: Pink curtains hanging lifeless either side and unseen streetlights provided a pallid backlight for the dancing flakes.

The smaller, sturdier left hand shifted with its pale pink nails tightened a little against the slightly larger right hand holding it; a head of mouse brown hair snuggling closer to the pale, slender neck and black hair of the woman next to her.

"Say Azusa," Ui whispered, "do you remember that Christmas? The one that brought us together?"

It was a silly question in many respects, Azusa thought, as she nodded. Firstly they'd known each other for a while before that Christmas, and the care and kindness Ui showed in that time had built the foundations, so to call it a start was a bit mis-leading. And secondly there was no way she would forget that Christmas Day…

* * *

><p>The day school broke up that year, just under a week before Christmas, Ui had approached her and Jun at lunchtime; wearing a bright smile and with her hair was tied into hastily constructed ponytails.<p>

Ui was always cheerful and smiling. She loved that about her – as well as the fact she was mature, sensible and always looking out for her.

Over the last few months though Ui's smile had seemed a little strained. From meeting up with Ui after school or during lunch it didn't take a rocket scientist to see her unhappiness was from loneliness. Ui's parents had been back once for a week since Yui had gone to college. Azusa struggled to imagine having her parents gone for a week let alone only being around one week. Of course Ui never said so directly but it was obvious everytime she spoke of home without Yui there, how her eyes sparkled at the prospect of Yui's return.

For the past week Ui had been looking forward to the Christmas Break and having Yui back to celebrate Christmas with her. Asa result her smiles and laughs had been much more genuine, finally the Ui she loved most had returned. However today Ui's smile was definitely wrong; far wider and brittle than she could remember it being.

"Azusa-chan! Jun-chan!"

"Hi Ui-chan!" They both replied in sync and laughed.

"Shall we go eat in the canteen today?" Ui asked. Usually they'd eat their bento's in the classroom as it was quieter. She frowned,

"Why?"

Ui paused a fraction too long and delivered another horrendously painful smile.

"I thought it would make a nice change…and I felt like trying the canteen food."

"You didn't bring a bento?" Jun queried, spotting the obvious.

Ui laughed, a fraction off key, "no, I forgot mine."

_Am I the only one picking up on this?_

Ui looked a bit embarrassed, "so is it all right if we eat in the canteen today?"

Jun looked surprised at the admission but said no more. For anyone else it could be seen as a simple mistake, but she knew Ui. Ui never ever forgot something unless something was amiss. Even without her forgetting her bento there was also the unnatural tension to her slender frame.

That tenseness diminished over lunch and Ui remained positive, speaking about school much as usual. She relaxed, but only a little. At the end of lunch as Ui was reaching the end of her katsu curry, scooping the last of the soft white rice, stained with the murky, tangy sauce, Ui asked,

"So what are your plans for Christmas? Do you two want to come round to ours on Christmas Day?"

Jun shook her head in regret. "Sorry but my family are going north to visit family over the winter break so I won't be able to make it."

The thought of spending Christmas with Ui and Yui was tempting but her family had invited friends round. She too shook her head feeling her black pigtails clip the side of her neck.

"Sorry, I have family round over Christmas. But I can meet up the following week."

She could swear that for a minute Ui trembled. But in a flash that horrible smile had replaced it. So superficial! It was a look that would give her nightmares for a long time to come.

"No problem, it would be good to see you then."

Ui said no more about it and changed topic. She remembered waving goodbye and wishing her a Merry Christmas as she turned into the road where her own house was.

In fact if it wasn't for Yui's Christmas card on Christmas Day she might never have realised the truth; she might never have taken the step that changed their lives forever.

* * *

><p>Outside the house a series of crackles sounded as a couple of pale red and green flashes lit up the blackness. Someone was brave to have endured the weather for the sake of simply announcing Christmas Day. Glancing at the clock Azusa smiled and flipped the paper calendar by their bed to December 25th.<p>

* * *

><p>It was snowing on the morning of that Christmas Day too, as she sat opening the cards and presents in her pile. Presents excited her; she had to confess to that. Not so much for the range of chocolates, clothes and other random items they produced as much as the experience of being able to tear through the shiny wrapping paper beneath the gaze of the lit up evergreen. Her parents were there as well as her grandparents and a handful of relatives and cousins. There were no turns as such, everyone had their own piles, and dove in.<p>

She could barely remember what she got that year: Some J-Pop music and new Trainers and definitely some chocolate; nothing out of the ordinary. After opening them she turned to the cards, that she had left to last; smiling at the squeals of joy from two of her younger cousins.

She went through the cards without much enthusiasm, several dropping various yen notes from doting relatives who felt they had taken the more sensible approach: That trying to understand what a teenage girl would want for Christmas was impossible so they'd allow her to buy what she wanted for herself. She wasn't so sure though, the money in the sales was useful but it felt like it was cheating the Christmas spirit of friendship.

She paused, recognising the handwriting on the next card. It was Yui-sempai, her loveable, naturally gifted sempai. She'd had a crush on her last year of sorts…but Yui was the sort of person who seemed oblivious to such things. Perhaps that was part of her attraction but ultimately Yui lived for whatever project took her attention.

She hadn't heard from her in a while, so she wasn't surprised to find a hand-written note fall out of the card. The front had a smiley faced guitar wearing a red Christmas hat on the front. It looked like Yui had drawn the face and glued the hat on herself and she giggled: Yui also had a wonderful creative streak. But where-as in the past her thoughts had always been of Yui they increasingly turned back to her sister now. She remembered the strain on Ui's face on the last day and felt guilty for the hundredth time, but as ever consoled herself with the thought that Yui would be there for her now.

She began reading through the letter. A third of the way down the messily scribbled note her eyes slowed as they took in the words. She re-read a couple of sentences twice for good measure and her heart flew to Ui.

Dinner was cooking but she suddenly wasn't hungry: The warmth of her own home had gone and all she could feel was the icy cold she could imagine at Ui's. It all made sense now, falling into place with crystal certainty. She stood, a little uncertainly at first as reason fought with soul, leaving the remaining couple of cards untouched. Then determination crept across her face. She walked into the kitchen to speak with her mother, who was making tea for her grandparents and dad. Her mother looked up, surprised by the serious expression on her daughters face.

"Azusa? What is it dear?"

"Oka-san, I need to go somewhere."

Her mother blinked, twice.

"I don't follow. You know dinner will be ready in under an hour. Will you be long?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry but there's someone who needs me. I just found out she's all alone today and I'm worried about her."

Her mother glanced out of the kitchen window at the falling snow. The ground was already an inch deep.

"But…" she began in hesitant protestation.

"I know. But I can't stop worrying about her…" She blushed, hoping that didn't sound quite as embarrassing as it now did in her head.

Her mother paused, the silver kettle's bubbling dying down to a murmur. Then she sighed and picked up the kettle and began pouring out the tea from it's stained black spout.

"The Hirasawa's right?"

She nodded. It wasn't hard for her mother to work that one out. She didn't make many good friends, as she was too reserved and quiet; though that was improving with her involvement in the Light Music Club.

"It can't be helped then. We can't have you worried on Christmas Day. But I want you to promise to call me as soon as you get there and keep me updated, or else I'll be the one to worry."

"Um!" Azusa exclaimed with more happiness than she realised she'd been holding inside. "Thanks oka-san." She grabbed her mum round the waist and hugged her tightly. And snuggled there as the hug was returned.

The thought of Ui alone at home came back to haunt her and she pulled free.

"Go," her mother said, "I'll apologise to the others on your behalf." Azusa gave another nod and took the second door out of the kitchen into the main porch where she quickly donned white woolly mittens, a white and grey striped scarf, a sky blue woolly hat with ear warmers and a blue puff jacket: Ui had helped her choose them a few weeks ago in preparation for the cold season.

_Everything good seems somehow tied to her_. _Yui is so thoughtless! How could she leave at her home alone like that to go on a training camp with band mates? That's Yui's problem, she only thinks of herself. Whereas Ui…_

Donning a pair of light brown Ug boots she exited the house as silently as she could and pulled the fur lined hood up over her head. It felt odd to be leaving but not upsetting. It wasn't as though she disliked being with her family or anything, but it wasn't as though she felt that needed or that she really enjoyed the quiet suffocating warmth of the afternoon conversation and Christmas TV.

Her boots punched holes in the soft snow and her breath steamed out in miniature clouds as she fast walked down the drive and onto the pavement. She chose to walk on the roads for the most part as the gritter trucks had already been, leaving an unpleasant but more walkable layer of pooling slush between the banks of snow.

Ui's house was a twenty-minute walk away, but it took thirty-five minutes that day. She didn't see another soul out aside from a group of shadowed figures in a car cruising the streets at cautious speeds as though lost.

She finally turned the corner leading into Ui's road. The snow had eased a little and she was able to see right down the long street. Now she began worrying that she'd over-reacted. What if Ui was spending Christmas with her parents? She should have called, but deep down she'd wanted to surprise Ui. Besides if she'd called she knew Ui would have insisted she was all right and that she should stay with her family; so unlike Yui.

_They balance well in an odd way, one too selfish and one too unselfish. I want to be there for her, for them. But even if she's there what do I say?_

It occurred to her she should really have thought about this sooner before charging out. If the way back wasn't so cold, troublesome and filled with equal embarrassment she may have turned back even then. Instead she took a deep breath and ploughed forwards.

Reaching the driveway she noticed two similar, faint indentations in angel shapes on the lawn. They were rapidly being obscured by the snow. _Did Yui come back?_ Through the front room window she could make out the green, blue and red lights adorning the Hirasawa Christmas Tree.

She pressed the white, circular button for the door bell and heard it tinkle inside with a merry jingle. She waited and waited. Then she pressed the bell again feeling foolish; maybe Ui had gone out. Then footsteps pounded closer from within the house and the door flew open.

"Yui?" Ui gasped hopefully.

She gritted her teeth wondering why hearing that name come out first from Ui made her feel angry for a second. Ui's eyes opened wide as she took in who was actually there.

"Azusa?" There was a hope in her tone that thawed out her anger at once and made her feel fuzzy. "Azusa-chan!" Ignoring the fact she was covered in a dusting of snow Ui flung herself about her, sobbing.

She hugged back as she felt Ui's head press against hers through the hood. Much more like her sister there was that childish love that emanated from Ui that she also cherished.

"How? Why are you here? Didn't you say you had family over?" Ui was clutching her back tightly as though afraid she was a ghost going to disappear.

She smiled and wrapped her arms round Ui. "It doesn't matter Ui. I wanted to spend today with you." Feeling herself go crimson she added flustered, "if that's okay with you of course Ui-chan."

Ui hiccuped a sob of happiness, "Um! Always." Then she regained some of her composure,

"Why don't you come in, or else you'll catch a cold."

Ui helped her out of her coat and hat, hanging them up on the empty pegs. She stretched; soaking up the warmth as Ui asked if she wanted tea. Nodding she sniffed the air, it smelt of roast meat and vegetables and gravy. The two snow angels filled her mind and once again she worried she'd intruded unnecessarily, she would have to ask Ui after she'd phoned home.

"Is it okay if I use your phone to call home?" She called out. "Hai," Ui called back from the other side of the house, kettle whistling merrily in the kitchen.

She dialled home and her mother picked up the phone: She had the distinct impression her mum had been hanging near it worrying and almost chuckled. In contrast this house felt empty, it needed people. She was glad she had come.

"Hi oka-san. I've arrived safely."

"Good, are you okay for food?" Azusa sniffed the air again and felt her stomach growl. "Yeah I think we'll be fine."

"Any idea how long you'll be staying?"

"No, but I think it might be a while…"

"Okay. Well have fun and take care Azusa. We'll miss you."

"Mmm miss you too."

The phone line went dead and she put the phone down. _Did I do the right thing? _She recalled Ui's arms about her and grinned. _Yeah. But is someone else here? _

She wandered into the living room. Ui was in the kitchen beyond tending to the oven whilst two cups of green tea steamed on the centre of the dining table.

There were two plates put out on it with cutlery and crackers in front of both. Azusa's eyes narrowed and she scanned the room. There were two piles of presents beneath the tree as well and the room had the same look as it had the year before, when they had all come over to stay the night. She grabbed a green tea from the tray on the table in its white cup decorated with pink flowers and dropped onto the brown cushy sofa, sipping it thoughtfully.

Ui walked back in looking abashed and with that annoyingly wrong smile on her face again. If you didn't know her you'd think she was genuinely happy.

She gritted her teeth: _She's gonna say something stupid again_.

"I'm sorry, you didn't have to leave your family for me. I mean I'm allright, you know."

And with that lie she saw it all so clearly: She saw Ui setting up Christmas Day as she always did; saw her falling back into the snow and making a snow angel, then getting up and making one for Yui; buying presents for both Yui and herself then wrapping Yui's anyway; cooking dinner for Yui and herself even though Yui was going to be elsewhere.

"Yui-sempai's not here is she?" She asked.

There was a visible shudder across Ui's delicate frame.

_I've become an expert at reading her somehow. _

"Well no… but still…"

"So who's all the extra presents for? The extra place? Who made the other snow angel?" Ui glanced in the direction of each as they were mentioned.

For a second she worried she'd got the wrong end of the stick completely and Ui's niece or some other person would spring into the room from downstairs. Then Ui collapsed to the floor and began crying.

"They were for Yui…b-b-but then she told me she was going to spend Christmas away with her friends. But we've never been apart for Christmas. I couldn't face doing it alone so I thought I could at least pretend she was here, but somehow it hurt more…I even cooked enough food for the both of us…"

There was a clink as she put her cup of green tea down on the perfectly polished dining room table and walked over to the huddled form of Ui.

She hugged her, drawing Ui's weeping face against her chest, to hold her close. She said nothing for a while, letting Ui's tears subside until Ui whsipered softly,

"I'm scared that you'll think me too weird to hang out with you Azusa-chan, that you'll leave me if I let go." Ui's hands trembled slightly against her back. "After all I ended up dragging you round here only for you to see how obsessed I am with my sister. I'm strange aren't I?"

"Honestly," she sighed. "I chose to come here. I wanted to spend Christmas with you." She ran a hand through Ui's hair, feeling a wave of protectiveness for her friend. "I just want to see you smile for real, you've been hiding your pain behind fake smiles for far too long. I need you to rely on me, because what I hate most is to see you faking happiness."

"Azusa," Ui choked as the hands clasped to her back eased their trembling.

She ran a hand through Ui's hair again, comforting her. _Somehow for all the embarrassment I've felt today with comments, saying what I did just now felt strangely natural. _

Her keen senses caught a whiff of something burning.

"Ui! I think something's burning!"

"Ah!" Ui jumped up and shot into the kitchen to try and salvage the food.

In the end the bacon was burnt and she ended up with a bunch of odd presents chosen by Ui for Yui (but Ui insisted she should open some presents as well) and they still ended up watching a variety of oddball TV programs whilst curled up together on the couch. Despite all of this it still felt better than any Christmas before.

* * *

><p>Outside the snow thickened again and she ended up spending the night with Ui. And as they settled down to sleep with hands entwined Ui had kissed her on the cheek and whispered, 'Thank you so much, for everything Azun-yan."<p>

It had taken her a full hour to lose the warmth in her chest and enable her to drift to sleep; at the time she had been too naïve to realise it was the first stirrings of true love.

"Happy Christmas Azusa!" Ui whispered shyly. Then she lifted her head and kissed her on the cheek, "Thank you for everything, _my_ Azun-yan."

This time she turned and captured her partners lips with her own. And as she briefly pulled away she whispered "Happy Christmas Ui."

* * *

><p><em>AN: Happy Christmas all XD I realised I hadn't yet done a yuri K-ON fanfic and this is one of my favourtite couples in the series so thought I'd better put together an Christmas one-shot for them :)_


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